Memoirs of a Prego

For those of you that follow our blog you know that I rarely write anything. I leave the tongue-twisting, witty prose to my husband. But I was thinking in the shower the other day—where many of us do our best thinking—that I really should have been writing down all the emotions I’ve felt during pregnancy. And while I’m already 32 weeks along, with a mere 8 weeks to go, I figured now is as good a time as any to jot some of my thoughts down. I’ll look back and be glad I did. Riley can look back and laugh.

What do I dislike about being pregnant?

Weight gain — It’s not so much that I’ve just gained weight (I expected that), but that I’ve gained it all over.

Charlie horses — My calf cramping up in the middle of the night into a ball of twisted muscle.

Lots of doctor’s visits — I don’t dislike my doctor’s visits as a whole, but I do hate sitting in a waiting room for 40 minutes before being taken into another room where I continue to sit and wait. I’m also not a fan of peeing in a cup each and every time. Nor am I excited by the climb onto the mammoth scale that confirms only one thing: I am the mammoth.

Bloating — As if weight gain wasn’t enough.

Back aches and hip aches — I’m about to give birth but I feel like an 85 year-old woman.

Hormones — These dirty little devils are pretty much responsible for every annoying thing: heartburn, constipation, soreness, fatigue and facial hair. Yes, facial hair! I am the wooly mammoth.

Losing the ability to bend — It sounds silly, but you take things like putting on pants, shoes, socks, shaving your legs, reaching down to pick up something you dropped for granted. Suddenly, every movement that requires your abdomen to bend however slight is a whole new complicated set of contortions. Fun to watch for Jonathan I’m sure.

Frequent peeing — I now hold the position of official restroom tour guide for the greater Scottsdale area. If you’ve seen it, I’ve peed it.

My hair — It has turned into some kind of straw, grass-like material. Lovely.

Burping — It was pretty entertaining at first. Whereas once the most I could manage, with the assistance of Dr. Pepper, was a sad little hiccup of a burp, I am now able (and required it seems) to belch out the nastiest, loudest, rip-roarenest burps of all time. While funny at first, now it’s just gross.

What do I love about being pregnant?

Men — No, really. I love watching men who would normally never throw me a glance suddenly stop what their doing, or turn around, or drop everything to open a door for me. It is silly and reminds me that everybody loves a pregnant lady. Of course, my man is still the best.

Shopping — Two kinds here. First, I love shopping for maternity clothes. Buying things two sizes bigger than you normally wear can be depressing, but hey, shopping is shopping. Second, I love buying baby clothes; itty bitty, adorable, ruffled, foo-foo, pink and purple outfits everywhere. She is going to be the best dressed little baby in the whole darn city.

My fuller bust line — Need I explain?

The Silent Code — Whenever I see another pregnant woman or a mom with a brand new infant, there is a silent exchange of sympathy and excitement. Sometimes it’s a nod, other times it’s a wink or a smile. The point is that we both acknowledge the mutual experience for all the goodness (and anti-goodness) it holds.

Massages from my husband — Granted, they hurt and I whine and complain, but they are so wonderful. Most nights I wouldn’t be able to fall asleep without Jonathan kneading my doughy body.

Not getting a period — Period.

Family excitement — The news of little Riley and her arrival has created quite a buzz among our family. Everyone is just so excited. It is a blessing to see and be a part of such a joyous time.

Getting to call my mom “grandma” — More fun than I thought.

Ice cream — As if I needed an excuse.

My belly — While it represents much of my weight gain (which I despise) it also represents life, and newness, and being a woman, and God’s gift. I rub it. I rest cups on it while watching TV. I oil it up to prevent stretch marks. I talk to it… hoping Riley can hear. It is my badge of courage and proof that the Lord is good.

Feeling Riley move — The first flutters were amazing. I was still kind of nauseous, too, so it would feel like a dip on a roller coaster. Now, 8 months in, she is bigger and stronger. She twists, kicks, pushes, reclines. At night I lay on my side and Jonathan lays next to me with his hand across my belly, resting it still so he can catch every movement. She always kicks for daddy. She is real, alive, growing, beautiful… and thank the Lord, she will be here soon!

Quick Update

There's so much going on right now. It's almost unbelievable. But God is so very good through it all. I don't have time to write much at this moment, but I wanted to give you all an update and let you know that I haven't forgotten about you.

1. Nicole is feeling sick, tired, hungry, fat and, sometimes, disgusting. But the baby (or Bam Bam as we have come to call the unborn child) is well. We viewed the first sonogram last week. How amazing, that at seven weeks, this child no larger than a peanut has a heartbeat. Truly incredible. There will be more to come on that topic soon.
2. We both went on a trip to Flagstaff for the weekend with our church high school group to help with the kids in our weekly home group. God showed up in big ways and did a lot. Praise Him!
3. I am sick, so please be praying. My job isn't exactly the type of position you can take off a couple days because you don't feel well.

And that's about it. For now at least. Look out for more soon.

"That's Married Life."

What people don’t tell you about marriage is that life keeps on happening when you say, “I do.” What I mean is: stuff keeps going wrong, work still sucks sometimes, the bills keep coming in the mail, etc, etc, etc. I think that, before that beautiful day, I thought life would somehow just change the next day. You know, the type of change you expect when you graduate high school, venturing off to college and into adulthood.

But that’s all wrong.

This past couple weeks has consisted of one thing after another thing after another thing breaking or going wrong. First, Nicole’s truck. Then, the toilet. After that, the kitchen sink. And then, our car. More significantly, Nic’s had some health issues and she has to go see the doctor. Of course, this all had to fall right smack dab in the middle of December, the month of presents, presents, and, did I mention presents? (If you’re reading this family, it looks like you’ll all be getting some very nice cards, accompanied by “thoughtful” presents. And if you feel so obligated, you can make checks payable to the Too-Much-Crap-In-One-Month-Cottrell Fund.)

Last night, Nic and I went to dinner at the Cheesecake Factory, sort of as an unspoken last meal until late January. It was scrumptious. Occasions such as that always make the meal taste better. Sitting there next to each other, we leaned our heads on each other’s shoulders, we ate well, and we laughed. We talked about how nice it is to know that, no matter how difficult things may become at times, we have each other to “lean on.” I didn’t break into song and dance even with the cue, because Nic verbalized it better. We have each other to “bear one another’s burdens.” Exactly.

If all this stuff wasn’t enough, this morning, we both woke up sick, the car turned out being more expensive than estimated, and I smell like vitamins. Flinstone vitamins. I don’t know how it happened. I just pulled my shirt out of the closet today and, after trying to locate the smell for a while, I realized the smell was not actually trailing, but it was on me. I’m not sure which little artificially flavored character I smell like—Fred, Barney, Wilma, Dino, Bam Bam, maybe just the collected smell of all the vitamins in a single bottle—but when it’s one thing after another like Nic and I have been experiencing lately, eventually, you just have to stop and laugh.

And the laughs just keep on rolling. Tonight, after I picked up Nicole from work, we walked into the house with a great big surprise waiting for us. As Nic turned the corner to enter the kitchen, she looked into our lounge and gasped. She stopped me and said, “Jonathan, pray before you enter this room,” quickly followed by, “Can I just tell you what happened.” Quite unfortunately, our water heater had begun leaking everywhere. It’s nothing a 16-gallon ShopVac couldn’t cleanup after three hours. Nonetheless, it was just a little too much at that moment. No worries, though, Nic and I are doing well, camped out at my parents’ house, mooching from my mom’s extremely well stocked fridge, just like old times.

As I told my mom about all the, shall we say, exciting events of late, she quickly said, "That's married life," to which I responded, "No. It's just life, and we happened to be married." I mean, for better or worse, richer or poorer, in sickness and in health is all ringing a little truer right now than we would have hoped in our first two months together. But this stuff could happen to anyone. And somehow, despite the fact we don't think it could get any worse (and we don't want to jinx ourselves), the worse is much better than any better would be on my own.

This Marriage Thing

RegardingUs.com is our attempt at letting our friends, family and the occasional strangers in on our marriage—the joys, the frustrations, the humor, the sadness, the adventure, the scares, the trials, the mushy gushy lovey dovey stuff, and more. Of course, we can’t share everything, but we'll try to be as open as possible.

“Why,” you ask? Well, there are three reasons. First, we want to keep track of the lessons we have learned and have a central place to visit and be reminded of every step of our romance. Second, we’re new at this marriage thing, and we know that others are new at it or will be new at it soon enough. We want to share the lessons of love we learn and hope to facilitate conversation among almost and newly married couples to keep love alive and encourage the bond of marriage before God and the world. Lastly, we know a lot of amazing couples who are not in any way new at this marriage thing, having been married for ten, twenty, thirty, even forty or more years. We very much hope and pray, for our sake and other newly married couples’ sake, that those who have gone through the highs and lows of marriage—the richer and poorer, the health and sickness, the better and worse—and stood the test of time would be open in this forum and share all that they have learned.

So, whether you’re about to be married, have been married a short amount of time, or are a marriage pro, please join us as we begin the rest of our lives.